Tale of Tails

Found this unpublished and rather strange little story and thought it might brighten up my rather earnest blog.

A Tale of Tails

The famous surgeon Mr ‘Snippy’ Maloney was to be best man at his brother’s wedding. He went to Moss Bros to be measured up for a morning suit.
There was a sad-faced rat in the shop; it was talking gloomily to the shop assistant.
‘I believe you rent out furry tails?’
‘Yes, indeed, sir. You can hire them by the month, or just one day for a special occasion.’
‘A furry tail might help me find a family. It’s my smooth tail that puts them off. They prefer furry ones, like you see on a squirrel or a chinchilla.’
‘Excuse me,’ said Mr Maloney. ‘I couldn’t help overhearing your conversation. May I give you my card, sir? I could take your tail off in an instant, quite painlessly. Then you’d soon find a family; you could pass yourself off as a hamster.’
‘I’ll think it over,’ said the rat.

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